I've been trying very hard to pull myself together each day. Out of five working days in a week, I called out sick for two days, two other days I came in very late, and another day being very sick at the office. This is why I no longer bought that Paulo Coelho, the universe doesn't conspire to help you reaching your "dream" (I'm still hating that word "dream", so superficial yet naive, a wrong propaganda). The universe is trying with all its might to bring you down, and this is what they called life. Everything could go so very wrong all at the very same time. I was so tired mentally, I tried to keep myself busy which made me also became physically tired. I would have this morning sickness when I had huge urge to vomit and I had no energy and no reason to live the day. And there are always those things that were out of my control that went wrong and stressed me out.
But anyway, I am alive. And healthy, which is important. And I've always tried to put smiles and laughters every time I whined, to show that I was actually okay and to tell myself that things are okay. I just have to find myself new reasons and new strength to continue on living.
And these were from Friday night last week when my office mate asked me to join him shoot whatever and wherever, trying some strobe thing. Ended up just shooting some vain portraits. Haha. I know I sucked at photography, but at least it helps keeping me being sane.
